Hey I am Halie. My one friend loves zombie movies and I am okay with some. But now I have a few rules for living in the zombie world. For all those who think they can cut it.
rule #1. I am going with zombieland here. Cardio. You got to be able to run fast when you need to. So be in shape or at least be able to squeeze pass a horde without getting bit.
rule #2. You got to able to let go.
Be it your morals so you can shoot a zombie in the head who was once a person. deal with the loneliness when all your friends are now zombies and eating your family like a box of chicken wings. Or be it that you have to move place to place. You can't let emotional connections hold you back from surviving.
rule #3 . No red foods.
No cherries, bbq, chicken wings, etc. We all know when we eat some stuff like sloppy joes we can look up and honestly say we look like zombies. So if you are eating on the run, which considering there is billions of people out there and most of them would be zombies you are, anything that makes you look a zombie when you run into other living people is just going to get you shot and killed. They aren't going to check to see if you have a working mind. It is a panicked times!
rule # 4. buddy system/ look out
You want to have someone to keep watch while you snooze. Last thing you would want is to wake up dead or as a zombie because you wanted to catch some z's. So have a friend or someone you trust to stand watch, and visa versa. protect each other from the zombie horde.
rule # 5. Don't be a prankster
Pranksters are already not funny and even I want to punch them right now. But if the world is full of zombies and you prank your friends that you are getting eaten you are either gonna get shot, or left for dead. And if not, someone is gonna kick your butt good. take a note from bill murray from zombieland. Pranks can lead to accidental death. Ow.
rule #6. be or make friends with stockpilers/creators
You want to be or have useful people around. If you have can't find food, and you know someone who has stock piled enough food for the next decade make friends with them. They might be useful. If you need to make your food stretch for longer a good cook would be useful, also they tend to be killer with knives so an excellent member of a zombie killing team.
rule #7. Do not be or have loud mouth people in your group.
One thing all zombie movies can agree on, zombies can hear. So if you make a cute joke and then someone is laughing so hard that you can hear them down the street, just leave that person behind. they will attract zombies and get you eaten. You want someone who can be loud if they need to be, but pretty much anyone who is always loud you want to keep away.
rule # 8. Beware of Egos
If you can avoid it, stay away from anyone who has an over inflated ego. More so if they are manipulative. Because they will make it sound like they took out every zombie for the last 8 miles. They will boss you around and not be very cool. You should have a leader, but not one who wants to lead. One that basically smacks the egotistic person over the head to lead or someone who is a closet egomaniac instead of an upfront one. Due to the fact if they are closet egomaniac while they do want to look good, they do it for you to praise them.
rule # 9 know how to drive in someway and pick your vehicle carefully.
Your car/truck/van or whatever it is you ride will be your first layer of protection in most cases. So you want to be able to drive without wrecking it and you want to be able to not be crushed in an instant by flailing bodies flying at you.
rule # 10 beware of bathrooms/ depends
like zombieland pointed out, zombies will attack when you present them an easy target. sitting on the toilet or hovering outside in the air is one, since you don't think "run" with your pants around your ankles. Zombies are like lions will strike in a group when you are at your weakest. So either you have an armed guard when you go to the bathroom or you wear stuff like depends. It could be a flying shit bomb! And if everyone is a zombie you will be able to find more adult diapers out there.
rule # 11 improvise!!
You have to be able to improvise in a world with zombies. Mainly with weapons. You never know when you will get attacked by what and whom. While sleeping with a baseball bat would be nice, it will bet broken and bent. Take note and use your surroundings. Guns run out of bullets, but if you blow up the zombies you will have them destroyed. You could beat a zombie with a fan for all I care. This also lends itself to directions as you do not know what could block you. Or dinner plans as unlike a zombie your meal you won't find huddle in a corner crying for it's mommy.
this is just the first 11 of many more.
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